Dinner with Charles
I had a beer with an intense Belgian, Dirk, at the Frenchman’s bar’ next to my guesthouse, then went looking for dinner. Found a typical Thai/Farang restaurant and choose a table near a couple of tables occupied by likely potential conversation partners. Sure enough the older gentleman at the next table started offering menu advice and we started a good chat. He was Charles from England. I moved to his table and took his advice:#6 on the European list. After 10 days of vegetarian, chicken and fish curries, soups and Pad Thai I order a medium rare steak with gravy, fries and veggies. I couldn’t finish it (and had a restless sleep on a very full tummy) but it was delicious and a nice change. Charles had finished eating (and had cleared his plate completely) and seemed very eager to tell me his stories……
Charles is 79 and living in a small village near the Burmese border. He is married to a 33 year old Thai woman – his 4th marriage – and has a 10 year old son (his 3rd child). He is a retired architect and most recently worked as an mediator/consultant in Hong Kong for large gov’t building projects. He travels to Chiang Mai by car and then flies to Hong Kong a few times a year – mostly for social occasions.
There are lots of European men walking around with Thai women – most are apparently “temporary girlfriends” though I met several westerners in the regular bars hanging with their Thai wives. On the day I hired a car and driver, my “driver” followed me around some of the temples and museums we went to – so I guess at least some of the guys are with neither girlfriends nor wives. Anyway Charles says he and his wife are a very happy couple. His son is fluently bilingual but he did not mention what language he and his wife use. I noted that the other couples I met seem to have limited communications (the guys were eager to talk to a farang).
The couples seemed a whole lot more normal than the sleazy girlie-bar scene (which is mixed in with the regular tourist scene) but these relationships are a rather an odd lifestyle in Bangkok or Chiang Mai – let alone living in a village near Burma! Oh well different strokes for different folks. The guys claim that most Thai men treat them women poorly and farangs do not. But the women seem a whole lot more emancipated than other Asian countries. Drivers, cooking teachers, travel agents and other occupations that would be male only in the other parts of Asia I have visited.
BTW, farang refers to non-Asian foreigners and the original meaning (long discarded- so I’m told) means “white devil”.
I had another day learning Thai cooking – at a different – even better school on my last day in Chiang Mai.
posted from BKK. Cheers
Southern Point of View 